"Yes boss...?"
"Are you all right?"
"Yeah boss, why?"
"About 10 minutes ago, when I went to check the inventory ..everything just stopped."
"Stopped boss?"
"Yeah..stopped, like everything was froze up."
"Weird boss...?...."
"I went outside and everything out there was frozen. So, I walked around the block and when I got back everything was unfrozen."
"Boss, have you been drinking again? Did you buy more giraffes?"
"No Looie, it was real..it really happened."
"Suuuure it did boss. So...you went to check the inventory?"
"What?"
"...you went to check the inventory...?"
"Yeah...yeah...
What the hell happened in there???"
"Well boss, it seems da Godfadda came in last night and redid it."
"It looks like someone had a paintball fight."
"Its the Godfadda's new system."
"Where is all my loot?"
"Behind the doors, boss."
"How am I supposed find them..guess?"
"No boss, Godfather redid the file cabinets. as well. See ....colored files.."
"How does that help me find my loot?"
"Well, it doesn't boss."
"What's it for? What do the colors mean"
"I don't know, boss?
"Who does, then!?"
"Nobody, boss.."
"Well, how do I find my weapons?"
"Oh...ok..look here boss... Let's say you want a weapon...first you go to file "d" or "a" for defense or attack, then check whether or not you are using it, look under files "i" for I own or "id" for I don't own or "a" for all weapons...then choose files ,"c" for common or "g" for gray,"u" for uncommon or "g" for green ..or.."r" for rare or "b" for blue, "s" for superior or "r" for red or "u" for ultimate or "g" for gold.. Then... we need to cross refernce the city of origin, that's sub-subfile "c" for city, then files "m","b","v","i","c" or "n" depending on what city..That takes you to page 2, line 2, slot 2 and
Voile! You find a.....Brigadier?"
"Uh Looie...that's a piece of armor."
"Yes, yes it is, boss.."
"Why can't I just come in and look at what I have without all this bullcrap?
It was Geeno, wasn't it, Looie? Da Godfadda sent over his 14 year old nephew, Geeno, to do this to me...didn't he?... Look at this place..!! I can't find a damn thing. Get rid if it, Looie...
get rid of it, now! Its crap! Set everything back up the way it was...!!! Looie....?"
"Uh... boss, da Godfadda strongly suggests we should oughta keep da new system and that we should kinda oughta like it."
"LOOIE!....Looie!"
"So boss...what were you looking for in the inventory..because we gotta go back to da file and..?"
"Looie, it happened again?"
"What did boss?"
"Everything froze up...I just got back from walking around the block."
"The block, boss?"
"Yeah......?"
"Boss?"
"Yeah, Looie?"
The inventory..what was you looking for?"
"Oh yeah...look in that room over there and tell me what that is.."
"Hired guns, boss..."
"No Looie, that is 428 plastic display dummies."
"Yes boss.."
"What are they doing here?"
"Da Godfadda sent them to you, boss."
"Why?"
"To help you fight..boss"
"They're mannequins."
" I know boss but if someone doesn't show up to fight, we can dress it up with 1 weapon, 1 armor, 1 vehicle .... and.... they get 1 animal."
"Looie... they're old GAP window display dummies, they're made of plastic."
"I know boss but.. if nobody doesn't want to help you no more, you can dress them up and..."
"Looie, they are dummies, they don't do anything but pose. Let me ask you Looie, has there ever been an instance where someone in my mafia didn't show up to fight?"
"No boss, they wouldn't dare..."
"Then get rid of those damn things, they give me da creeps."
"Uh... boss, da Godfadda strongly suggests we should oughta keep da hired guns and that we should kinda oughta like it."
LOOIE!....Looie!
"So boss...what were you looking for in the inventory..because we gotta go back to da file and..?"
"Looie it happened again?"
"It did boss?"
"You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you Looie?"
"No boss."
"Looie take a letter...
"Dear Godfadda... I don't know what keeps happening. I think someone maybe put somethin' in the water. I start to do somethin' and everything just stops..like it froze up. Do you have any idea what could possibly be going on? I wouldn't ask you but
it is your building and its gotten a lot worse as of late....Your loyal friend, sign it da "Boss" and mail it."
"Ok boss, I got an answer."
"How? You just now mailed it...?"
"Just opened the mailbox and it was there, boss."
"How?....?...Give me that...."
Quote:
| "Thanks for contacting Da Godfadda. I have received your question and/or request and will get back to you within 48 hours. Make sure your mailbox is set up properly and both flag and door are operable, to assure you get mail from Da Godfadda." |
(96 hours later)
LOOIE!...Looie!
"So boss...what were you looking for in the inventory..because we gotta go back to da file and..?"
"THIS IS DRIVING ME NUTS!!"
"What boss..?"
"NOTHING! Did we get a letter from da Godfadda?"
"Just came in boss."
"Give it to me...
Quote:
"Dear valued mafia member "da Boss",
Being a mafioso myself, I know how much of a problem of froze up can be. Please be patient as I am currently looking into your problem of froze up and will get back to you soon.
In the meantime, try putting up new curtains, painting the outside of your building and dumping your trash cans.
Da Godfadda"
PS..
Visit my booth in the Marketplace.
NY consumables now on sale...
Untraceable Cell phone $2,500,000
Buy Money!!
Special discounts for favored mafia |
"Looie!"
"On it, boss!!"
"LOOIE!...Looie!"
"So boss...what were you looking for in the inventory..because we gotta go back to da file and..?"
"Never mind that..take another letter."
"Dear Godfadda, I have painted the building, put up new curtains and emptied every trash can in the neighborhood.....That didn't help, it seems to be getting worse. Things are froze up more often than not. Your desperate and loyal friend,da Boss."
"Mail it Looie..."...mails in, boss."
Quote:
"Dear valued mafia member "da Boss",
Sorry, I know how disconcerting froze up can be "da Boss" and am well familiar with the problem of froze up. This is a known issue, many other mafia members are also currently experiencing the problem of froze up. Try buying a baseball bat and if that doesn't fix the froze up, try moving to 2011 Krohm Blvd.
Da Godfadda'
PS..
Visit my booth in the Marketplace.
Moscow consumables Now on Sale!...
Untraceable Cell phone R$2,500,000 each
Buy money now!
Special discounts for favored mafia |
"Ok Looie, thats the last of it...That should be everything... Put the rest of those dummies..uh hired guns.. over there."
"Boss.."
"Yes, Looie?"
"This place is not nearly as fancy as da old place on Foxfire Drive."
"No, its not Looie, but if da Godfadda says moving here will make everything stop freezing up... then I'm movin'."
"LOOIE!...?"
!!! I can not stop to laugh.. 
love it!
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